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About Stavanger

Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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First off, I hit the streets of Horten, right? I’m strolling down Storgata, feeling all good. The sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m like, “Yeah, today’s gonna be lit!” But then, bam! I trip over a cobblestone. Classic me, right? I’m like, “Really, Horten? You gotta do me like that?”

Auction: record-breaking jewels from billionaire Heidi Horten